I have a choice. Part of life is definitely a series of choices. Most of the time it seems as though I don't necessarily have a choice, but I am continually reminded that I do. So that must be the truth, correct? While I am surely not going to reach any level of perfection, it IS possible for me to do the right thing, to choose what is better. It has been an EXTREMELY slow process, but I am learning to make choices. I am learning that I have a choice. I have a right to choose. I think for a long time I have seen myself as a victim who could only succumb to the destructive ways of my mind, but it doesn't have to be that way. I do not have to be nailed down by my struggles.
It is a mental, emotional, physical fight every single moment of every single day right now, but I have hope that it will not always be like this. I have hope that I can come out on the other side at some point. And maybe, just maybe, it won't feel so cumbersome to make these choices. Maybe I could feel a little more normal again...whatever normal is. I don't think there's a clear definition for that at all! :)
Today I will remind myself of this verse...
Psalm 73:26
"My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."
Thank goodness I do not have to rely on myself for everything. I have to make choices, but I can get the strength to do so from the Lord. That is a choice too. But it is possible.
I choose to make today one full of success.
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